


Finding Happiness Amongst All This Death

by LairdeCyfarwydd



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-10-26 02:26:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10777533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LairdeCyfarwydd/pseuds/LairdeCyfarwydd
Summary: ((General spoilers for all episodes after episode 59))Falling in love is hard to avoid when you only have seven constants in this part of your life.





	1. Heart-to-Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I've seen a lot of comments about shipping Magnus and Taako. 
> 
> Personally, I don't ship them in the events of the podcast, because Travis clearly stated that Julia was the love of his life and Magnus was done after that.
> 
> But Taako and Magnus COULD have had a thing before that.
> 
> And I felt like writing out that interpretation. THIS WILL BE FLUFF ONLY, as I am uncomfortable writing sex.
> 
> Comments are welcome! Please be nice about criticisms tho!

Taako didn't trust people.

Sure, that was kind of a given. He and Lup had grown up on their own, working to keep themselves in safe situations and always keeping an eye out for each other. But despite her tendency to cautiously look out for others, Taako had always kept his circle between just himself and Lup.

That was why, even after 10 years aboard the Starblaster, Taako didn't tell much to the others. Sure, he would joke or talk about important things, but he would still put him or his twin in front of the others without a second thought.

Lup was always more friendly than him. People connected with her but never found a way around Taako’s wall. He found that as the years droned on, Lup spent more time in other's company, while Taako was left to watch Merle and Capnport joke around as Lucretia wrote ferociously in her journals, or Barry was scribbling away in his own notebook, head full of numbers and equations.

That was why Taako was so surprised to find one night that, as he was turning into bed, Magnus was waiting in his room. "Did you get lost on your way to bed?" Taako asked as he took his red jacket off and hung it on the hook next to the door. "Or were you so lonely for Taakos company that you decided to stalk him?" He grinned, showing a bit too many teeth to be comfortable as he teased.

Magnus was fiddling with the corner of his jacket sleeve, making Taako think he was nervous. Dropping the act—slightly—Taako sighed. "Magnus my man, if you need a shoulder to cry on or something you've come to the wrong room." He moved to usher Magnus from the room, ready to take a break and get some rest but Magnus’s hand on his arm caused him to hesitate. 

"Nah, no that's not it." Magnus said, shaking his head to emphasize his point. His hand had moved at that point back to his face. Picking at the budding beard that graced his chin, he continued. "I wanted to talk with you."

Taako hesitated, then sat next to him with a heavy sigh. His body language screamed annoyance, but something stirred in his chest as he sat so close to Magnus.

"Taako, the rest of us, we are all family. I can't help but care for everyone. We've been through so much, the seven of us." Magnus's words started slowly but soon they were tumbling out of his mouth. "But you're always holding yourself separate. You look out for you, and for your sister. But the rest of us could burn if it meant you and Lup got away safely. In fact, I'm pretty sure that's happened once so far, hasn't it?"

"You mean we all got out safe because of my genius, my dude." Taako was quick to correct Magnus's words, and he felt no shame for saying them or having done the deed. They all got out safe because of Taako, but no. That hadn't been his goal. At that point, it hadn’t even been what he had expected to happen.

"But--Taako." Magnus sighed and buried his head in his hands. "Taako, you don't understand. To get home again, we are going to have to do this together. I'm not asking you to blindly trust everyone on board, but can you try and at least give us a little warning when you're going to go off and do something? Look out for us too?" He lifted his head and looked at the elf. His eyes were bright—were those tears in his eyes? Either way, Magnus smiled slightly. “You’re part of this family too.”

Taako didn't make a face, but he wanted to. Instead he rolled his eyes and laughed. "Of course my man! I've been looking out for you all since the beginning! Too bad you couldn't pick up on it." He grinned at Magnus and slung an arm around his shoulder. "That it, dude?"

Taako didn’t necessarily feel as chill about it as he was pretending to be but it was easier to do that than to get angry. And the others would be less angry at him this way anyway. It was also the quickest way to get people to leave, to agree with them. Taako had been around these conversations before, he knew it from experience.

"I--I suppose." Magnus's stammer made Taako’s loose, casual movements pause as he looked more carefully. Magnus's face was red. Once again, Taako felt that peculiar stirring in his chest. Magnus stood, and for an instant Taako felt an ache in his chest but he didn't move. Magnus walked towards the door, then stopped as he opened it. 

"I--I care about you, Taako." The words didn't seem to come out of Magnus's accord. He blushed more deeply following that, and hurriedly followed up with, "We all do," as he left the room and let the door slide shut behind him.

A slow, small grin made its way across his face as Magnus left and Taako put two and two together. His hands clasped in front of him, but he made no move to follow Magnus despite dearly wanting to. It didn’t matter to do so at this time now though. Taako knew about Magnus’s feelings. He’d bring it up later.

Taako just had to make sure Lup didn’t find out first.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'Finally landing on the new planet, Magnus leaves camp to get some air.

Chapter 2

After confronting Taako, Magnus rushed directly to his room, not even stopping to chat with Barry when they passed in the hallway. He was beet red, completely embarrassed by the way he had acted in the bedroom. Nerves weren’t usually one to bug Magnus, but this apparently, had been an exception.

He paced for a bit once there and then settled into his evening exercises and stretches before the nervous energy worked itself out of his system. Seeing however, that it was only their first night on the planet and it looked to be a fairly peaceful planet, Magnus found no harm in going to bed and falling asleep instead of checking in with Captain Davenport before doing so.

The next morning, Magnus rose and got dressed, stopping only to wash his face before he made his way out to the deck. Captain Davenport was already there, probably he took over from Merle early in the morning. Lucretia was looking out over the oncoming planet, her face unreadable. But for the most part that was it for the awake part of the party at that point.

"Capnport!" Magnus grinned at Davenport's rolling eyes as he leaned against the railing. "Any signs of life yet here?"

Davenport shrugged and shook his head. "We have lots of vegetation though," he answered, glancing for a second at Magnus before he turned his eyes back outside. "Usually where there's plants, there's other life."

Sometimes there wasn't, but Davenport had sharp eyes. He'd see it if someone was alive and moving down there. Magnus was inclined to trust him after 10 years aboard this ship.

Lup and Taako entered shortly after Magnus had settled down, watching the planet underneath with Lucretia. His eyes were drawn quickly to Taako, as his mind went back to that embarrassing conversation last night, but Taako didn't even meet Magnus's gaze. "Good morning, my dears!" He called, chipper as usual as he and Lup sat down. He looked at Magnus then and grinned but Magnus couldn't tell whether the grin was intended to be malicious or if it was just Taako being Taako.

When Taako made no move to confront him about their conversation last night, Magnus decided to try and settle down so no one else would discover the awkwardness that had erupted between the two of them. In fact, he decided to drop the issue altogether. Until Taako brought it up, at least. 

The un-Magnus nature of that thought made his stomach drop in realization. 

/Fuck…I think I’ve got it bad for him.../

It ended up taking a few days for the Light of Creation to fall from…wherever it came from, this time around. Lup ended up being the one to point it out as it fell just past the trees on their right. Davenport wasted no time wheeling the ship around to follow it. Magnus sighed happily, glad they’d finally be getting an excuse to get out of the ship for a bit. In fact, as soon as they found a small clearing to land in Magnus had popped the doors open, eager to get off and see what was out there. He didn’t like being cooped up.

Though there was nothing but trees in the immediate vicinity, he was excited. Stepping outside of the Starblaster would mean having space to oneself, and Magnus wanted to take full advantage of that to figure out how to fix the damage he had caused between him and Taako. First thing though, was to find the Light. Lup and Barry were the ones that had tracking it down to as close a science as they could muster, so the rest of them set up camp in the clearing. Some of them set up their bedrolls under the stars while other would climb back aboard the ship. Either way though, cooking, washing, and relieving oneself tended to take place outside once the ship landed. 

It took the better part of another full day for Lup and Barry to triangulate the Light. Once they did though, it looked to be a simple enough trip. A week’s voyage east, and they’d be within a square mile of it. Magnus volunteered for the journey without hesitation, and was pleased to see Davenport up for joining him. Meanwhile, Barry opted to stay near the ship, and investigate some flora he had found nearby. Lucretia volunteered to stay on the ship for the year in case of attack, and the twins stayed behind with one grand plan or another. They had gotten so wrapped up in each other’s spitballing that Magnus couldn’t quite follow their intentions by the time he was getting ready to leave.

They left right away, finding no sense in waiting. Magnus took the lead, using his axe to cut down anything that stood in their way while Merle and Davenport kept an eye out on their surroundings. None of them however, saw the light-footed figure that was never far behind them.

As the three of them stopped to camp for the night, Merle built up a fire and Davenport prepared for first watch. Magnus was getting ready to sleep, with his bed roll laid out on the ground. Before he crawled in though, he stepped out of the firelight to relieve himself quickly.

With his pants unlaced, he was focused on the job at hand when he heard those light footsteps approach him again. Magnus didn't take the time to lace his pants back up before he grabbed his axe to aim it at the figure. But, when the distant firelight reflected on Taako's face, Magnus groaned and chucked the axe halfheartedly to the side where it buried itself in the ground.

"Jeez I'm not one to argue about a show, but..." Taako stepped from the shadows in front of him with an amused grin on his face. Magnus looked for a second at the elfs face, but his embarrassment quickly slid into annoyance.

"If you don't want a show, maybe you shouldn't fucking follow me into the woods!" he growled, taking a minute to lace himself up. Despite the dry response, he didn't have the heat of anger to back up his words. Of course, Taako would probably pick up on that. Magnus didn't bother to check out Taako's face to find out, badly as he wanted to study Taako's face. "I thought you and Lup had other plans than to follow this Light."

"I had...other interests." Taako's grin widened at that point. Magnus had gone to grab his axe and head back to camp, but something in Taako's voice made him pause. Instead, Magnus ambled over to lean against a tree, facing Taako. Taako grinned and shook his head when he saw Magnus paused and ended up being the one to close the distance between the two of them. Suddenly, Taako was /there/. Right up against Magnus. His breath hitched in his chest as he felt Taako’s breath on his beard. 

"Such as?" Magnus's voice had lost all of its edge, a little breathless. His heart was hammering in his chest. Taako meanwhile, had reached forward to play with the knotted lacing holding Magnus's shirt together. Magnus looked down Taako's slender fingers, delicately moving in and loosening his shirt. Magnus felt the blood drain from his face, moving…elsewhere. He hoped it wasn’t noticeable, but Taako tended to notice everything. For once, the elf didn’t mention it though. Instead, he looked up into Magnus’s eyes. He grinned for an instant but that was it before their lips were pressed together.

It was a cautious one on Taako’s part, Magnus could tell. And despite dearly wanting to return the kiss with fire, he held back. He did however, put his hand gently behind Taako’s head to press him closer. Taako leaned in against Magnus in return, the two of them pressed against the tree for a scant moment before Taako pulled away.

Taako got a look at the shocked—but not disappointed—look on Magnus’s face. He chortled. There was a heavy blush on Taako's cheeks but he was taking it a lot better in stride than Magnus seemed to be. "So if we're doing this, big guy," he started, winking at Magnus as he took a step back, "we need to lay down a few ground rules. First, we keep it quiet for now. Trust me, you don't want the shovel talk from my sister just yet."

Magnus numbly nodded, his brain still fizzing in surprise and delight. He didn’t quite have the words at hand to respond at that moment.

“Second, we have our fun but since I gotta /live/ with you if this goes badly, we’re not going to put the relationship first. If we run into trouble, we’re done dating. Got it?”

Magnus nodded again, slowly gaining control over his ability to speak again. “Look, Taako, I don’t know if this is good when it comes to the mission.” He shook his head as he thought over his words for a second. “We should hold off until we’re in a more safe…situation.”

“When will that happen? Trust me! Waiting won’t guarantee shit.” Taako rolled his eyes and grinned. “You get back to camp though. The others will wonder why you’re all red.” He laughed at that and turned to trek back to the ship. He took a few steps, then paused and turned. “You know what? I’ll join you this time. Why not?”

Magnus frowned a protests rose in his chest but he did his best to quash them, managing to get out a choked squawk before words came. “What’ll the others think to see you and I just returning from the woods?”

“Cool it, doll I got this.” Taako was walking back to the camp before Magnus could add anything else. “Hey dudes! Thought I’d join you. Lup’s plan was getting boring.” He had already laid down on the ground and stretched out luxuriously by the time Magnus had returned. Davenport raised his eyebrows, but said nothing. Merle on the other hand, chuckled.

“Pull on up to the fire, buddy!” He stretched his arms out and patted Taako’s knee before the elf jerked his knee away. Merle seemed to take no offense though. Instead he turned to kneel to say some prayer off to Pan before he turned in for the night. Magnus crawled into his bed roll as well, turning to look at Taako through the fire. The light against the dark backdrop masked most of the elf’s face but Magnus saw a flash of a grin before he rolled over. Burying his head under the blanket, Magnus allowed himself a few quiet minutes of joy and excitement for the future without any worry. Then, with a few deep breaths, he calmed himself down and forced himself into perspective before closing his eyes and doing his best to get to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Tres Horny Boys+Davenport set off in search of the Light.

Taako had laid down with the others, but he spent his night just staring at the stars as he laid on his back. Meditation happened after a bit, but even the simple meditation practices failed to quell the sparks of joy in his chest.

He had kissed Magnus. And better yet, Magnus had kissed him back.

Sure, the big guy was nervous about it. It was probably his first time kissing another dude. Taako had known he was into guys since he was young but he knew from experience, not everyone seemed to know as early on as he had. There were no nerves under his skin, just happiness.

As usual though, a touch of uneasiness was hiding under the fizz of happiness. They had…avoided relationships on the ship. Plenty of friendships had formed, and there were some pairings that other people had bets going on with, but no one had broken that particular ice yet. No one wanted to be the one to break the fragile companionship they’d be forced to endure for who knew how long.

On top of that, Taako’s natural distrust of opening up to anyone didn’t help either…but if there was someone to open up to, it might as well be Magnus as anyone else. Magnus at least had a sense of humor Taako could get behind.

He ended up getting up when he felt pretty rested, letting Davenport head off to bed early. He took the gnome’s place at the edge of camp, lounging against the trunk for a bit before he decided to try his best to climb it. Though not strong, Taako was resourceful enough, swinging his legs and getting his weight to help propel him higher in the tree until he had found a comfy little nook. Settling in, he kept himself busy listening to the quiet of the woods until sunlight tinged the edge of the horizon.

Taako swung down when he saw the light. Digging through his bag, he found travel rations which he made a face at. Wiggling his fingers and muttering a spell, he turned his dry bread into hot toasted bread with butter, and he even took the old fruit preserves and turned it into sugar and cinnamon that he sprinkled on top. The crunch and the sweet saltiness of the toppings just made him sigh in contentment. Much as he loved to cook, Taako couldn’t get past the simple joys of breakfast foods.

It took the better part of an hour for the rest of them to wake up, and for them to douse the fire and eat their morning rations. Taako waited somewhat impatiently, but he didn’t say anything to rush them. 

Taako got bored quickly. Though he had cared about collecting the Light to help protect planets, planning for down the road tended to take priority for him. Roughing it in the woods was not helping him down the road. Nevertheless, he stuck alongside Magnus for the rest of the trip.

The two of them did find time away from the others, stealing away for quick kisses or heavy flirting. Taako tended to be the one to instigate the flirting, Magnus tended to be the one to get his words twisted around. And that usually lead to him kissing Taako to stop him being so witty.

Other than that, he was bored. And bored Taako could get dangerous. He took to finding trinkets along the way, rocks or pinecones, then using his powers to transform them to other things. It burned up his spell slots but it kept him from wandering off or sharpening his tongue.

 

No signs of life came across them until they stopped to camp for the night, and the glow from the Light Of Creation was close enough that they were walking in a specific direction. Taako took first shift, and Magnus stayed up a little later than the others so they could have a little fun before Magnus went off to bed. It had been over a week that they’d been there now, and the lack of life meant that Taako found no problem whatsoever with this.

That night though, Taako stopped Magnus midkiss when he heard the rustling of branches to his right. “Did you hear that?” His voice was slightly breathless still from the kiss, but still alert. Magnus pulled away, his brow furrowing as he listened.

They stayed like that for a few seconds before the rustling of branches once again. Magnus broke away, and Taako moved immediately toward the sound. Nimbly, he climbed up into the branches to try and grab whatever was up there.

He stood, silent. Wind rustled through the trees. Then suddenly, shaking leaves. Branches moved. Taako saw movement and dove. He managed to close his hands on something soft as he felt to the ground. Curling around it, he did his best not to hurt the thing, nor to jar it as he hit the ground.

Keeping a tight grip, Taako held the thing away from his body. First thing he wanted to call it was a mushroom but quickly he realized that wasn’t quite true. Growths on the sides were wiggling of their own accord, and the way the stalk was twisted around on itself, it looks nearly like a face. “What are you?” He asked it, but it just squeaked in…fear? Annoyance? Taako couldn’t tell. It didn’t say anything he could understand, but it looked like it was intelligent enough. He pointed at himself once the thing calmed down, saying, “Taako.”

Magnus had shown up by that time, kneeling next to him. “What is that?”

Taako ignore him, instead watching intently for the thing’s response. It didn’t respond as if it understood him, still much too concerned about getting free. Finally, he let the thing go. It squealed and took off into the bushes. Taako made no move to follow it, instead standing. “No idea, my man.” He finally answered. “Doesn’t want anything to do with us though.”

He turned to move back to the camp, intending to leave the mushroom as something to watch for but Magnus couldn’t let it go, it seemed. “What if there’s more than just him?”

“Who says it’s a he?” Taako retorted as he walked back to camp. “You go on to sleep. I’ll keep an eye out.” He stopped at the edge of the firelight, and smiled with only a trace of mischivisnous this time at Magnus as he approached.

Magnus grabbed his arm with his other arm, and shrugged. He didn’t look Taako in the eyes. “They might be dangerous, so be careful, okay?”

Taako chuckled quietly, but inside he was rolling his eyes. He said he would be safe. They had found one so he’d be able to find others. He’d be fine when Magnus woke for his shift later. “Good night!” He replied, chipper sounding as usual as he kissed Magnus on the cheek. “And sweet dreams!”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group finds the Light of Creation. Tragedy falls. Lup gets annoyed.

Taako died.

Not that night, nor the night after. It was two or three days later. Magnus had caught the elf nodding off one night by the fire, and that had been his first clue that something was wrong. Elves didn't sleep, after all.

Taako assured him that everything was fine and that he was doing well, but he had admitted one night when the two of them had been the last awake, that the little mushroom creature had come back that night. With friends.

They had teeth, apparently, and had bitten Taako on the lower leg. The bite had vanished already from his leg, so it couldn't have been that bad. That had been what Taako thought, at least. But he hadn't wanted to say anything until he had started...losing time.

The way Taako described it, was the way Magnus would describe sleep. He was dozing. Meditating, except he wasn't there at all. He urged Taako to tell the others, but he wouldn't say anything. It wasn't their business. Magnus got the feeling that Taako had debated about telling him anything before coming clean. When Taako went off to meditate for the night, Magnus sighed and shook his head before he made a mental note to talk with Taako about trust again.

When Merle took over watch, and Magnus went to sleep, he tossed and turned until he went to shake Taako lightly on the shoulder. He wasn't going to be able to sleep until they had had that talk. But Taako wouldn't rouse, he didn't even stir. And when Magnus placed his ear against the elf's mouth, he detected no breath. 

A strange calm settled over Magnus. Taako died. That bite had killed him. Magnus knew that he would be back when they flew away from the Hunger at the end of the year but after such a recent change in...whatever their relationship was, Magnus didn't quite know how to cope.

Numbly, Magnus woke Davenport and fetched Merle. The three of them doused the fire, and though Magnus wanted dearly to do something for Taakos body, they did no more than send a quick prayer before carrying on.

They met more of the mushroom people before the end of their trip. They had been born in the Light of Creation, it seemed. Though they loved it dearly and it took the three remaining figures a long time to convince the people to let them have it, they did eventually get it, and they returned to the ship with little action.

Lup was unhappy when she saw that Taako had not arrived with them, but did not ask. It wasn't until Magnus took her aside--Davenport was busy preparing the Light for transport and Merle was filling Lucretia in on what had happened on their trip--and gave her the news. He smiled wryly at her when she drew a slow, measured breath in.

"Yea... Taako needs to learn to open up a little. Merle might have been able to help him out a bit if he had." Lup didn't look happy at all, but there was nothing Magnus could say to change things.

"He'll be back by the end of the year." Magnus's words seemed lame in comparison to both of their unhappiness, but he said them nonetheless. That did draw a small smile from her face, and she nodded before walking away from camp. Magnus would have worried had she not mentioned something about needing some air. He took the time to let the rest of camp know but no one else took it so harshly.

The rest of the year kind of blurred together for him. They had all grieved for one another over the years, when an untimely death took one or another of them. Magnus's had never taken so long, though. Alone, he resorted to surly responses when caught off guard. 

Lup took him aside after a month or so of his behavior, taking him a ways away from camp and under the guise hunting down some more of this plant that she and Barry had been studying. Once out of earshot of camp, she folded her arms and leaned against a moss covered tree trunk. "I don't know how long you and Taako have been dating, and to be honest, I don't care." 

Magnus protested at that, but knew deep down that he probably would have been better following Taakos wishes of keeping it quiet if he hadnt been so childish since they returned. Either way, his protests fell on deaf ears.

"My little brother probably didn't want me to get all over protective of him. But even if he was dating someone I've never met, I'm not going to. I trust him to be able to protect himself." She looked at Magnus then, her brow level. "But for the rest of our team, you need to keep it together. Got it?"

Magnus felt like a chastised child, but nodded. "Good," she smiled at him before the two of them lapsed into an awkward silence looking for this plant. 

The year came, and went. Magnus did his best to pull together, though it took another month for him to start acting normally. He exercised and trained. Keeping his body busy helped keep him sane. Back to his old self, the group settled into a bit of a routine, everyone taking up small projects to pass the time and learn about the planet. Magnus took to climbing after a bit, learning to use his muscles to pull himself up into the treetops and teaching himself how to fall out safely. Once mastered, he took to frightening the others in the middle of the night, hiding amongst the leaves and sneaking up on the watch. He decided that he was training them to be alert. They decided he was being an ass.

And then, the year hit. The Hunger descended, and they took off into the planar system. Magnus waited, antsy. Lup caught his eye and rolled hers, but she grinned too. She looked forward to seeing him again as well.

Soon enough, the familiar feeling of stretching out, seeing strands of lights peeling away from him. Magnus smiled, though it disappeared from his face when he returned to where he was. A familiar bruise appeared near his eye. And Magnus turned to see Taako standing next to Lup.

A smile graced his face as Taako turned, confused. Apparently he hadn't been aware he had died. But he returned Magnus's smile too as their ship descended into another world.


End file.
